Leap Years

Fucking what?

Be March or get fucked.

Fail-O-Meter:

Michael Bay

Nice job on ruining Transformers, cumbucket. You turned a timeless cartoon of awesome into Japanese Seizure Robots.

Special effects =/= cohesive narrative.

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Sloths

Lazy fucks. Get a job.

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Matthew Hardy (continued)

My mouldy bowl of alphabet soup writes better jokes than you, fuckhead.

Let's look at this list of comedians who have done the "Fuck ay, Australian'n shit, yeah?" schtick before:

- Chris "I'm a Bloke" Franklin
- Kevin "Bloody" Wilson
- Austin Tayshus (You know. That cunt who had the Australiana song back in 1983)

Oh sure. They all had 5 miuntes of fame. But where are they now? Back doing shitty gigs at the Bowral RSL, and if they're lucky, a matinee gig at the Masonic Nursing Home in fucking Toorak.

But still, you can't even hold their jockstrap. Do yourself a favour, and get the fuck out of my comedies.

If you're looking for work, the kid that mows my lawns just moved away. You can have his job. It pays about the same as a shitful comedian, anyway.

Fail-O-Meter:

Counting Crows

Rock and roll may not be noise pollution, but you are.

Get haircuts and fuck off.

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Peter "I'm a stupid fuck" Everett

Get off my TV you fucking twat. I can't decide whether you are actually the world's stupidest incompetent fuck or that you just get a kick out of ruining pretty much the only good show on day time telly. Bring back the guy who looked like Adam Hills.

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Yofranks (continued)

Click here for back story.

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The Fab/Spree Alliance's attempted monopolisation of the budget washing powder industry.

Don't think I don't know what's going on here, I'm on to you.

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Nigella Lawson

Seriously woman.

Tits or gtfo.

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Look at your pants.

Your pants: Look at them.

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Dave

Oh hey Dave, what's up man? Yeah. Yeah sweet. Me? Oh you know, the usual. This and that I guess. You know, the same old routine, really. I get up, I go to work, then I come home for a bit of GET THE FUCK OFF MY INTERNETS, FUCKFACE.

Fail-O-Meter:

The things that I hate.

Fuck those things.

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This Shit

Ok, 2 things.

1. This email claims to be from someone called Yofranks yet it states in the from column that it is from Qui Tang. I do not know anyone who goes by either of these names.

2. What the fuck sort of name is Yofranks.

DELETE

Fail-O-Meter:

Brad Garrett

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Cowboy pilots

Click here

If you took your hands off your dicks for five seconds you might actually get a chance to remember this:

Plane goes on runway.

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