"Fuckhead's "insert lame prefix here" Vampire has earnt 3 vampire points by attacking you 3 times. Click the 'Start Biting Chumps' button to become a Vampire and start biting other chumps! You can also fight other Zombies, Vampires & Werewolves now!"
Hey I got a better idea, how bout I come over to your house and pop you in the jaw for 3 points. How does that sound?
Fail-O-Meter:
I've got a much better system for judging goals.
If the ball goes in the net, it's a goal.Fail-O-Meter:
THIS IS A SECRET SHOW SO DON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT'S A SECRET. AND IT'S ALL SUPER SECRET AND EXCLUSIVE SO DON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT IT. IN FACT, IT'S PROBABLY NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I MEAN, YOU TELL PEOPLE THAT, BUT JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME IT'S TOTALLY HAPPENING AND YOU SHOULD COME BECAUSE IT'S A SECRET SHOW THAT EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING WORLD TOTALLY DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT. YOU ARE SUPER HIP AND COOL AND TOTALLY IN ON THE BIG SECRET. AWESOME.
Fail-O-Meter:
Lift our game, we bunch of slack cunts.
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Sure, the boobage is great. But at some point you have to force yourself to realise that it's David Duchovney playing a role that ISN'T Fox Mulder.
And as if that weren't bad enough, the entire premise of the show is built around an aging, not very good actor, getting "sexy" all up on my TV screen, whilst throwing out C-Bombs like they were network-televisional gumdrops.Hail of fail.
Fail-O-Meter:
There are only 3 fathomable reasons someone would do this
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